A List

Things I Hate*:

• People who flick their “butts” out the window. Nasty filthy pigs.
• Improper use of grammar i.e. Your, you’re, there, their and they’re.
• Kiwi in my mixed fruit salad. Vile fruit.
• Being asked for a drink 782 times a day by Addyson.
• Hearing the same 7 songs replayed over and over on the radio, usually at the same time on various channels. Nothing is “Dynomite” or “Bulletproof”. “I’m Not Afraid” to be “Riding Solo”, but I do “Love the Way You Lie” about your “Teenage Dream,” “California Gurls!”
• Macarena themed Snuggie commercial.
• Chain letter style statuses on Facebook. If you have a donkey that was abused by Chilean sea bass fisherman while on vacation in Spain, repost this. I bet 95% of you won’t.
• That buying a new printer is generally cheaper than buying color ink for the printer you already have.
• Driving in Mount Vernon, where old people come to die, because Florida is too far away.
• My crooked ears.
• Being attacked while on the computer by Tim the cat by shoving random objects off of the armoire onto my head.
• Finding a dirty dish 10 minutes after I started the dishwasher.
• That if you don’t clean the pan immediately after making scrambled eggs, you might as well throw the pan away, cause that crap ain’t coming off.
• That people on Judge Joe Brown, call him Judge Joe Brown. No other court show follows this.

This last one will probably tick a lot of people off, but that’s life!

• I HATE breast cancer awareness and any sort of donation to the Susan G. Komen Foundation. We get it, breast cancer is real and it needs a cure. Why do we ignore other cancers? Other body parts are affected by cancer too, ya know. Is it because it involves boobs? That’s what Curtis says. I get that brains, pancreases, and lymph nodes aren’t as sexy as a boob, but I’d like to find a cure for those cancers too.

You’ve got enough cash Susan, let some other department have a go at it. I do not buy ANYTHING that has the pink ribbon on it or the words Susan G. Komen. It burns my ass when I see anything pertaining to breast cancer and breast cancer awareness. My family knows how I feel and they support me. Sometimes they joke about it, Curtis bought cat food once with the stupid pink banner on it and I almost clocked him with it. I denounce it all! FYI, I will not be asking Facebook to go pink. Oh and I also hate that football teams are wearing pink, way to be sheep!

*This is just what I could pull out of my ass without much thought. Imagine what I could do if I really thought hard about it! (Not enough space on the Interwebs!)